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Dad Jokes (let's hear your worst! ;-)

Boarder came down for his day. Old Dad; "So what brings you to our town?" Boarder; "I'm the entertainment at the tavern tonight." Old Dad; "Entertainment? What do you sing?" Boarder; "Oh, no I don't sing. I'm a comedian." Old Dad; "A comedian?" Boarder; "yes." Old Dad; "Well go on. Change color for me."
 
Q: Where does a bee go to the bathroom?

A: At the BP station

As told to me by my 3rd grade son over 2 decades ago.

Still one of my favorites.

Hope you have a British Petroleum gas station in your area so it makes sense. ?
 
A woman taking golf lessons had just started her first round when she was stung by a bee. Distraught, she went back into the clubhouse and told her golf teacher about the incident.

"Where did it sting you?" he asked.

"Between the first and second hole," she replied.

He shook his head and said, "That’s your problem right there. Your stance is too wide!"
 
Q: Where does a bee go to the bathroom?

A: At the BP station

As told to me by my 3rd grade son over 2 decades ago.

Still one of my favorites.

Hope you have a British Petroleum gas station in your area so it makes sense. ?
My mom told me that joke years ago. It was one of her favorite (clean) jokes.
 
"Daaaad I'm hungry"
"Hi Hungry, I'm dad!"
classic.

That was very common in my house growing up.

Dad wasn't someone that a young person talked back to. If he saw you stumble there was no sympathy and he said, "Walk much?"

When I grew up, I started responding more acerbically.
Dad: Walk much?
Me: You taught me how.
Dad: You must not have listened.
Me: You mumbled.
 
What rock group has four men that don't sing?
Mount Rushmore


When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be.
Turns out, identity theft is a crime.
 
Why don’t crabs give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish.
 

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