Dad Jokes (let's hear your worst! ;-)

[wattmatters]

This one had potential

It was made in Sparkistan.

 

[justgary]

I bought a sweater and it has a LOT of static electricity, so I returned it.
The person behind the counter exchanged it for another one, free of charge!!

I'm shocked they made the return so easy.

 

[justgary]

I get a charge from these puns.

 

[Daddy Tanuki]

Just make it quick and relatively painless .
Tell her to calm down , because she is acting like her mother .

Jesus Mary and Jumping Joseph why in the name of all that is holy would you do that? You trying to get someone killed?

 

[Daddy Tanuki]

This one had potential

Negative?

 

[Recovering EE]

I get a charge from these puns.

I find them revolting.

 

[justgary]

I find them revolting.

Yes, these people need to conduct themselves better.

Perhaps they need less resistance to good jokes.

More power to them in the current situation.

 

[justgary]

Now you got me all amped up!

 

[Hog On Ice]

They seem to get a lot of reactance .

 

[FilterGuy]

I love these short jokes.

 

[FilterGuy]

It is clear that all of us that are participating in this are not are very well grounded.

 

[Danke]

I love these short jokes.

When I was younger, I was an expert at removing shorts.

 

[sunshine_eggo]

When I was younger, I was an expert at removing shorts.

Yours don't count.

 

[wattmatters]

Some of these jokes are apparent, not real.

 

[Supervstech]

A few too many coronas i suppose, leaves to a dangerous discharge...

 

[Daddy Tanuki]

I love these short jokes.

just because you a re 5'3" does not mean that you can make short jokes playing them as electrically challenged

 

[Recovering EE]

When I was younger, I was an expert at removing shorts.

I dated a woman in college who wore Levi 501 jeans. (Quite well, I might add.)

They were almost as effective as a chastity belt.

Perseverance ruled the day.

Ohm my!

 

[sunshine_eggo]

Oh man... The shrink to fit 501s of the 80s and 90s... That's still my definition of the perfect backside.

 

[Delmar]

Ahhhh to be young again. I'm still 6'-3" and have the same length inseam. But my belly keeps getting lower, so my jeans keep getting shorter to accommodate. Picture taken around '82 or '83 by my girlfriend, now wife of 40 years.

 

[justgary]

Oh man... The shrink to fit 501s of the 80s and 90s... That's still my definition of the perfect backside.

I have always had great x-ray vision, but it doesn't have to work very hard these days with all the stretch asspants walking around.

 

[sunshine_eggo]

I have always had great x-ray vision, but it doesn't have to work very hard these days with all the stretch asspants walking around.

Yeah. I mean I appreciate booty shorts and camel toe as much as the next guy, but I'll take them 501s.

 

[Rednecktek]

The difficulty of undoing a button fly was exponentially proportionate to the need to pee though.

 

[wattmatters]

I tripped over a box of kleenex the other day and hurt myself.
It's OK though...

Spoiler

it was only tissue damage.

 

[Supervstech]

I tripped over a box of kleenex the other day and hurt myself.
It's OK though...

Spoiler

it was only tissue damage.

Ya tripped over a kleenex box?
Sounds like too many salads.
Try some hungry man meals

 

[Delmar]

I tripped over a box of kleenex the other day and hurt myself.
It's OK though...

Spoiler

it was only tissue damage.

There is a huge difference between when a man or a woman say "I went through a whole box of Kleenex watching that movie"