Alright, new update. I've installed the 5A balancer (so easy!!!) and I think it works, at least the little diode is on.
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I put a 25A load on the batter for 20min or so to try to shave off some of that cell saturation, then re-connected the charger. The charger chugged along at 30A, as expected, until cell #3 reached 3.65V. The rest of the cells were at #1: 3.606V, #2: 3.533V (119mV behind) and #4: 3.567V
Total voltage of the pack was 14.35V. The charger is set to AGM, so my assumption is that it will spit out however many amps the battery asks for until they kinda reach some saturation.
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If the balancer is working, it would seem that 5A is not enough to even out the cells for the amps coming from the charger to taper down, as it's supposed to do in the charging profile. That's mostly what bothers me... This battery is much more likely to be charged at 100% than to be discharged to 0%. If that 100% happens often, I'd rather have the charger stop the charge than rely on the BMS's mosfet (wouldn't want one of those to fail).
Maybe I'll look into the voltage sense relay that someone else suggested. That'd stop the charge, but again, ideally I'd like the charger to do that as it was designed!
I started a 25A capacity test last night too and got around 281Ah before the BMS triggered (set the value to 2.65V).
Now I'm charging the battery again at 30A. That discharge and the following charge are done with the active 5A balancer. We'll see how that goes.
I did tip the battery briefly and heard quite a bit of gurgling! Got me panicked for a minute until I read a few posts saying that it's mostly normal... Still weird though.
Several questions then:
1. Is Redarc wrong in making their Lithium charge voltage 14.5V?
2. Is there an easy way to check if this works properly?
3 bonus question: Am I still chasing perfection? I'm just not really happy with the end of 100% charge being controlled by the BMS rather than the charger.