JeepHammer
Solar Wizard
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2019
- Messages
- 1,149
Mine would be starting the homestead,
Other than hand tools, a 1973 Jeep CJ was pretty much what I owned.
So I started building...
I found out that battery powered tools from 25 years ago had Ni-Cad batteries, so we all know how that went.
Batteries being more expensive than the took kit when you bought it, and *IF* you remembered to charge them, they were dead in 10 minutes of serious work...
SO...
Being the 'Smart' one, and believing all sales propaganda, I got a coupon for 15% off a 'Horror Fright' generator and scratched up the money,
Jumped in a '73 CJ5 Jeep the state highway department wore out 24 years earlier, and headed 60 on open highway for the nearest Horror Freight with my 'Coupon'.
Keep in mind this Jeep hit tire grooves in the highway and made involuntary lane changes at 45 MPH,
I hit the highway at 60 MPH and learned the true meaning of seeing my life flash before my eyes!
More than once I had to look around for the high pitched scream of a little girl before realizing it was coming from ME!
Geared for off road, the engine was screaming, knocking, the undefined of something burning, tire balance vibration made focusing your eyes VERY difficult,
And everytime I met a car the Jeep wanted to dive for oncoming traffic or the ditch!
At one point, I hit a pothole and couldn't slow down, a mud dobber nest had fell off the firewall under the dash and wedged behind the throttle linkage holding the throttle pedal down!
No top, couldn't hear yourself think.
It was cold, so I turned on the heater...
No heat, but the blower motor made a high pitched scream that was so ANNOYING it took your mind off being cold...
I get to Horror Freight and they have exactly ONE generator (while supplies last!) And I had to argue with another customer to get the generator...
I RACED the old guy on a cane to the register to be the first to slap money on the counter,
I'm the proud owner of a 'Horror Fright' generator that's "Compare To Honda" quality!
(I'll bet the guys at Honda falls out of their chairs laughing every time they see that!)
Then I see how big it is in the box, look at the bed of a '73 Jeep, look at the box again...
Well, I really don't need the box, so wedge my new treasure in the back and light out for home, with a generator banging me in the shoulder with every bottle cap size bump in the road, 70 miles of terror on the way home, and it's getting dark... And colder...
I stopped and bought a 'Go Colts' scarf with loose change, and pointed the Jeep generally north, mashed the throttle,
Hi Ho & a puff of blue smoke! I was off!
This is where you find out the difference in '73 headlights and 90s headlights...
You know where the road is, but you don't see anything IN the road, the man eating potholes are a complete surprise!
At least it keeps you awake...
After being turned almost completely backwards in the highway by the draft from a semi, I actually survived the trip...
The next morning I oiled up, gassed up, and broke out the instructions for the generator.
Even the pictures were in Chinese...
Taking my best guesses, and after pulling my guts out on the starter cable, I found the bad oil sensor switch terminal (crimped onto the INSULATION) and got it fired up.
There is something to "Compare To Honda"! Never started/tested at the factory...
About 2 hours of run time the generator frame took to shocking you...
About 3 hours of run time, the unique smell of burning insulation then a crunching sound, the engine locked up.
The crank would slightly move, but the generator was locked solid...
Again, something to "Compare To Honda".
Grabbed the receipt, threw the generator in the back of the Jeep, and pointed it south.
Common sense kicked in, and I waited until morning to go so it wasn't the 'Stevie Wonder' driving experience again,
I do learn something once in a while...
After a particularly cold and terrifying 70 mile trip, I find out it was a close out, can't even order a replacement...
And they want to give me store credit rather than refund.
I need the refund to BUY LUNCH!
They gave me crap because I didn't have the box, so I went and pulled it out of their dumpster and dragged it into the building.
After about an hour of yanking on the pull cord, poking at it with a screwdriver, they finally gave me money back.
I went and bought lunch, then after two trips to the 'City', I went and bought ball joints, tie rod ends, bushings, etc,
FOR THE JEEP!
TWO terrifying trips (not being smart enough to slow down) was enough, time to get out the hammer collection and broken 1/2" drive socket and fix the Jeep!
My laundry got easier after that, no scrubbing stains out of my shorts...
While I *Could* gut the 'Cordless' battery and add a cord, use the Jeep battery to power the 'Cordless' tools,
The experience of being LAUNCHED into ditches & oncoming traffic seemed like the more serious issue,
It was either that or take along changes of UNDERWEAR!
There is no moral in this story, it ends with the Jeep getting some much needed maintenance work, me still not having a generator, having to do laundry sooner since I went through underwear faster, and I still leap before I look...
I just thought it was 'Humorous' in the stupid sense of the meaning.
Sometimes you just have to learn the hard way...
Other than hand tools, a 1973 Jeep CJ was pretty much what I owned.
So I started building...
I found out that battery powered tools from 25 years ago had Ni-Cad batteries, so we all know how that went.
Batteries being more expensive than the took kit when you bought it, and *IF* you remembered to charge them, they were dead in 10 minutes of serious work...
SO...
Being the 'Smart' one, and believing all sales propaganda, I got a coupon for 15% off a 'Horror Fright' generator and scratched up the money,
Jumped in a '73 CJ5 Jeep the state highway department wore out 24 years earlier, and headed 60 on open highway for the nearest Horror Freight with my 'Coupon'.
Keep in mind this Jeep hit tire grooves in the highway and made involuntary lane changes at 45 MPH,
I hit the highway at 60 MPH and learned the true meaning of seeing my life flash before my eyes!
More than once I had to look around for the high pitched scream of a little girl before realizing it was coming from ME!
Geared for off road, the engine was screaming, knocking, the undefined of something burning, tire balance vibration made focusing your eyes VERY difficult,
And everytime I met a car the Jeep wanted to dive for oncoming traffic or the ditch!
At one point, I hit a pothole and couldn't slow down, a mud dobber nest had fell off the firewall under the dash and wedged behind the throttle linkage holding the throttle pedal down!
No top, couldn't hear yourself think.
It was cold, so I turned on the heater...
No heat, but the blower motor made a high pitched scream that was so ANNOYING it took your mind off being cold...
I get to Horror Freight and they have exactly ONE generator (while supplies last!) And I had to argue with another customer to get the generator...
I RACED the old guy on a cane to the register to be the first to slap money on the counter,
I'm the proud owner of a 'Horror Fright' generator that's "Compare To Honda" quality!
(I'll bet the guys at Honda falls out of their chairs laughing every time they see that!)
Then I see how big it is in the box, look at the bed of a '73 Jeep, look at the box again...
Well, I really don't need the box, so wedge my new treasure in the back and light out for home, with a generator banging me in the shoulder with every bottle cap size bump in the road, 70 miles of terror on the way home, and it's getting dark... And colder...
I stopped and bought a 'Go Colts' scarf with loose change, and pointed the Jeep generally north, mashed the throttle,
Hi Ho & a puff of blue smoke! I was off!
This is where you find out the difference in '73 headlights and 90s headlights...
You know where the road is, but you don't see anything IN the road, the man eating potholes are a complete surprise!
At least it keeps you awake...
After being turned almost completely backwards in the highway by the draft from a semi, I actually survived the trip...
The next morning I oiled up, gassed up, and broke out the instructions for the generator.
Even the pictures were in Chinese...
Taking my best guesses, and after pulling my guts out on the starter cable, I found the bad oil sensor switch terminal (crimped onto the INSULATION) and got it fired up.
There is something to "Compare To Honda"! Never started/tested at the factory...
About 2 hours of run time the generator frame took to shocking you...
About 3 hours of run time, the unique smell of burning insulation then a crunching sound, the engine locked up.
The crank would slightly move, but the generator was locked solid...
Again, something to "Compare To Honda".
Grabbed the receipt, threw the generator in the back of the Jeep, and pointed it south.
Common sense kicked in, and I waited until morning to go so it wasn't the 'Stevie Wonder' driving experience again,
I do learn something once in a while...
After a particularly cold and terrifying 70 mile trip, I find out it was a close out, can't even order a replacement...
And they want to give me store credit rather than refund.
I need the refund to BUY LUNCH!
They gave me crap because I didn't have the box, so I went and pulled it out of their dumpster and dragged it into the building.
After about an hour of yanking on the pull cord, poking at it with a screwdriver, they finally gave me money back.
I went and bought lunch, then after two trips to the 'City', I went and bought ball joints, tie rod ends, bushings, etc,
FOR THE JEEP!
TWO terrifying trips (not being smart enough to slow down) was enough, time to get out the hammer collection and broken 1/2" drive socket and fix the Jeep!
My laundry got easier after that, no scrubbing stains out of my shorts...
While I *Could* gut the 'Cordless' battery and add a cord, use the Jeep battery to power the 'Cordless' tools,
The experience of being LAUNCHED into ditches & oncoming traffic seemed like the more serious issue,
It was either that or take along changes of UNDERWEAR!
There is no moral in this story, it ends with the Jeep getting some much needed maintenance work, me still not having a generator, having to do laundry sooner since I went through underwear faster, and I still leap before I look...
I just thought it was 'Humorous' in the stupid sense of the meaning.
Sometimes you just have to learn the hard way...
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