Thanks. Is there a relay brand thats known for reliability or being the best? Also, is there any reason not to buy a relay that has several times more capacity than whats needed just to have an extra buffer?
This is where your specific setup will need to dictate the device(s) required for disconnecting loads and charging. As an example, for my 48V bank, the only loads I have are the inverters (nothing else connected to the batteries), and those inverters have on/off switches that specifically turn off the inverter (ie, the switch does not turn off charging). Very little current flows through those switches, so I'm able to use very small solid state relays (
Crydom ED10F) to disconnect my loads (by simply switching off the inverter). On the charging side (I have my BMS set up in separate port mode, so it can disconnect loads and charging independently, depending on the fault state), I've got two 40A / 200V SSRs (
TE Connectivity SSRDC-200D40), one for each positive main line coming from my two 3s2p PV arrays. The VoC of each array is 120V, with Isc of ~20A, so I've got a good amount of headroom on those relays.
All that said, my setup is fairly unconventional. Most people seem to run in common port mode with a single contactor (or shunt-trip breaker, or really big SSR) switching off both load and charging. This contactor would typically be placed fairly close to the battery main + so that all loads and charging are switched off in a fault state. In that type of setup, you'll need to size the DC contactor appropriately for the maximum amount of current you expect your battery to deliver/receive. In your case (16s2p), you probably want one per battery, allowing you to run smaller contactors.
To your question of 'headroom' on the relays/contactors, the two downsides I can think of to oversizing your contactors are 1) cost, and 2) the amount of current the coil requires to keep the circuit closed. Shunt trip is a nice option, as they don't take any power when the circuit is closed; the down side is that they have to me manually reset, where as a contactor or SSR will automatically reset when the fault clears. Note also that the shunt trip shown in that video is VERY expensive...
If you tell us a bit more about your system setup, it will be easier to help you with a recommendation on disconnection device.